Bat fit - Loosing weight finally

Since I met Johan, I have gained weight slowly but steady. I adopted his lifestyle and it wasn't good for my health at all. Last year I weighed heavy 95 kg for my modest height. That is dangerously unhealty for a woman in my age with heart failure as a heredity.
Recovering from psychological health issues and working full time, plus studying half time prevented me from doing something about it.
What actually made me determined and get the motivation, was a stair with 400 steps I had to climb when visiting a mine last winter.

My heart raced and I felt the taste of blood in my mouth. I had to stop several times to take my breath and couples far more older than me, passed by and asked how I was. I felt lousy.

I bought a gym pass the next day.

I started with weigh lifting and inspired Johan to buy a gym pass as well. 

It's very uncomfortable to show you a selfie I dislike. My training clothes fits like a sausage casing, and I look swollen.

He also joined Weight watchers, wich we had done before, but failed. I resisted.

I got a smart watch, a Samsung 3s from Johan as a birthday gift

Can you read the number at the clock on the bottom middle. 79 beats per minute, that is the lowest heart rate I tracked. It was more often over 80 beats and that is a big sign of lack of health.

As we had a long snowy winter, I went cross country skiing a couple of times per week. We have amazing tracks in the neighbourhood..well forest. 

This is me, finally reached the top of the mountain with a fantastic view. I'm tired and have a full moon face. I snore heavily at night for obvious reasons.

When Johan started to loose weight, I joined Weight Watchers programme. It worked excellent this time. I beleive there are more than one reason it works. 

First of all, our mindset is set for change and determination to end this, we are encouraging to each other.

Second, I put in an IUS, to end my Niagara fall menstruations, migraine, mood swings and the feeling of being ill once in a month. This was a huge positive change for my physical and mental health.

Third, the new Weight Watchers system really works. I loose weight without much effort or being too hungry. I learn to combine foods so they don't add on my weight.

The result is that I lost 12 kg and have changed clothing size. I shop my closet, find old clothes that fits again. Maybe I'll post a new selfie later.

I can really recommend the new Weight Watcher system. Yes, it is expensive, but the money i once put on restaurants I can now save in the long run.

I had to write about my trip to Edinburgh in arrears, because I really wanted to tell you about it. I also wanted to write about something nice.

Right now, we are planning another great adventure, that I will write about later.

Winter vacation part 1

Schools are closing one week in february every year in Sweden, thankfully the teachers are also off work. Every weekend I take a stroll through my garden to do some snow shoveling, feeding the birds and checking animal tracks. The photo below shows my backyard. It looks empty besides a few trees but it's because the vegetable beds are covered with snow.

I wanted to show Alfons the mountains and go skiing with him and Oskar so yesterday, I drove for 3 hours to get to Sälen, wich are the closests alps here. It was an amazing and fun day with my boys. On the top of the mountain, the icy snow blasted our faces. It hurt but it had a wonderful taste and smell of the ocean. Some of my strongest memories are connected with a smell, so now I have another one.

I call this post part one, because we only have been from work a half week. This weekend will have some really great things happening so, to be continued..

Return of the light

Wow. Time flies so fast that I hardly have time to catch my breath. I'm about to wrap up  my graduation from University and finally become a certified teacher. Boy it has been some exhausting three years. I'm exhausted and tired of school. Right now, I'm also a bit tired of my work as well, because the work weeks are soo busy. A full time teacher works a lot more than others, thats why we have these long vacations at summer, for hibernation. I have a short trip to Edinburgh to look forward to soon. If you have been there and have some good tips, please write me a comment.

Winters have become shorter, thats sad (global warming alert). We had a few weeks with lots of snow and coldness along with sunny days and those conditions are perfect for outdoor fun. I love skiis and skating and I'm thankful that my son still want me as a companion on skii picknicks in the forests. He's soon becoming a teenager.
I'm trying to persuade him to follow me on a daytrip to the mountains for down hill skiing, we'll see.

One reason that I don't write here that much anymore is that I've started journaling the analogue way. I jot down small thoughts and use the journal to process things that makes me sad.  I've had some bad things happen that made me fall back in a depression last summer, but writing everything down helped me a lot. I also print out, glue in photos and decorate the journal with washi and paper scraps. The inspiration comes from instagram and youtube videos about Midori Travellers Notebook and junk journaling.

Here's a short list of inspirational and favourite videos, there are both flip through, tutorials and journaling videos. I really need some quiet time with my papers and glue to cope. Oh and throw in some glitter too!

Andrea G Scripture junk journal

Tiffy butter How i make my Junk journals

Amity Bloom Midori Journaling

Tutorials of Ephemeras Garden

 The photos below shows an example of a junk notebook I made for a coworker as a birthday gift. She likes flowers, green and orange, as you can see.

Things that happens right now, bad desciscions and cruel bills are written and affect people world wide, it makes me worried. The facebook feed fills up with political articles by a particular face. My challenge this week is to log out from facebook for a week and avoid the news. 

Remember that if you are at the bottom of the well and look up, you will see the light in the tunnel.

Throwing out old garbage and looking forward to a fresh start

For me Bat Fit has been a lot about mind cleansing recent years. Until las autumn, I was surrounded by toxic people at a toxic job and it left me feeling completely useless. A couple of years ago, I was deeply depressed, suicidal, but during my journey back to life, a couple 

of descisions were taken:

1. Get healthy enough to get another job. If you feel useless and depressed, I can assure you that it is impossible to get hired elsewere.

2. If you don't find a proper job. Think of doing something completely different. So I started school agin at the same time I had my pissy full time job, but it worked great. Eventhough I should be more stressed, I was actually happier and felt that Im not that stupid useless crap my bosses made me think.

3. Get another profession. My goal was to become a highschool teacher in chemistry and I sended out my CV's to a couple of local schools and heard nothing fo 8 months. Last year a principal called and wanted to book an interview. I got a new job.

4. Finish my exam and do a excellent job. This is were I am right now and can admit that I haven't been a good student but a great teacher working too much. I have a couple of essays to write this week before next semester.

5. Loose weight by excersise. My dream is that I will be able to run again. But a broken knee and overweight prevents that now.

6. Eat healthier. I know what works for me and that is low carb with lots of vegetables.

These two last things are difficult as I work most of my time awake. I have to make room for exercise and to make healthy lunch boxes and stop eating in front of the tv. 

All the working, studying and bad eating have given me a stress belly. I have always been an hourglass, but now Im an barrel shaped figure. That is very dangerous because heart failures runs in my family.

During my holiday off work, I've been taken daily walks and a bit of weight lifting.

My face has become really puffy lately.

Thank godness for beautiful surroundings!

My breakfast this morning was a green smoothie. A habit I must start again, slowly. If you don't start slowly you will end up with bad headache.

If you haven't heard about Bat Fit yet, hop over to Frannys blog to read more, and join the amazing facebook group.

I usually hate shopping in town. But as I got money to spend for Christmas I made an exception. A big wool sweater, a pair of earrings, an expensive but very good deodorant and a book. 

For you Swedish speaking readers, I can really recommend Mörkersdottir förlag. The owner writes horror and supernatural fiction and herself and releasing books of other writers, like the one above. 

Sekten på Dimön (The sect on Fog Island) is based on the writers experiences of the Scientiology church were she were living and working for the inner circle. I'll post a review of it once its read.

Bat fit post: About Deep breathing

What many doesn’t know is that lots of us walk around with high shoulders and narrow breathing. This is caused by inner stress.

  You can be stressed even if you move slowly and are resting, why? It’s all about what happens in your mind. Even if you look like a lazy log, your mind is busy with sorting tasks, thoughts that comes and goes, annoying people, a work you’re not satisfied with etc. All those tasks, sorting and negative loops, causing a stress symptom with higher levels of stress hormones in your body and you are ready to flee even if you won’t.

This is an automatic unconscious reflex that your body does, and is crucial when you actually need it. 

  But you don’t need to flee, there is no were to flee and you are captured in your own mind. And when you’re not running, you don’t use your adrenaline for what it should be used for. This can cause symptoms as migraine, pain in the neck, lack of oxygen in your blood and in the long run; heart diseases, depression etc.

Good for: By deep breathing you will lower your levels stress hormones like cortisol, adrenaline and noradrenalin. You will increase your metabolism and if you exercise, receive better results.

  By breathing in an optimal way you’ll get more oxygen in your muscles and cells, your immune system will be stronger, your blood circulation will be faster. You will also give your inner organs a good massage and release blocked emotions. While exhaling you will empty your alveolus of toxins and excess carbon dioxide.

  This is practiced by some philosophical and religious movements, like meditation, yoga, mindfulness. By being aware of how you breathe, you will also be conscious about your emotions.

How to: Always breathe through your nose. The mucous in your nose will filter and warm up the air and you will be more resistant to diseases.

  Lie down or sit comfortly. Try to relax for a moment. Then during one minute, count the breaths you take. How many were they? You should breathe 10-15 times during one minute while completely relaxed. If you did, excellent. If you didn’t, follow these instructions:   

  Close your mouth and put the tip of your tongue in your upper gum behind your front teeth. Inhale through your nose. While inhaling (with your mouth closed) try to make the sound o (without actually making it) it gives a calm hissing sound, by that, you’ll press the air up to the sinuses, you can feel that the air is cold. Put your hand on your belly, it should lower while exhaling and rise while inhaling. Put the other hand on the chest, the chest should rise after the belly, otherwise, your breathing isn’t deep enough. Try to hold your breath a little moment before exhaling. While exhaling try to make the sound m, this relaxes your chest, try to empty your lungs as much as possible by press lightly with your diaphragm. 

 This method (with the hissing sound) is called Ujjayi-breathing and is practiced in yoga. Of course you don’t have to make those sounds with people around unless you will be viewed as weird. Repeat 4 times.

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 How often:  Try to focus on your breathing in different situations. Take a moment a few times a day.

 If you are really stressed and it doesn’t help you for the moment, this is a signal that you are stressed in an unhealthy way and should try to get rid of the reasons for it.

Some of the information comes from following links. They are in Swedish though except the wikipedia site. You can also watch the corny instructional video on youtube below, it’s in English.

http://www.halsosidorna.se/Andningsovningar.htm

http://wellness-wisdom-wealth.se/halsa/andningen/djupandning/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwlCk9XTz_U#t=214

http://www.morotsliv.com/2012/12/djupandning_12.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diaphragmatic_breathing

 Good Luck!

Sewing and skiing

I have made a pair of leggings for myself. First I printed the grey fabric in a flower pattern. I used one of the stencils from Alabamachanin. I used a pair of old leggings as sewing pattern. One thing I learned from the sewing book I bought from Alabamachanin studio is that jersey knits works fine without hem stitching. So my leggings are without hem.

Here I sit by my new office table that is height adjustable :). No more aching back, yay!

From the scraps of the fabric i cut strips and knotted them together to make a bracelet thingy. Looks a bit weird but matches my leggings.

 I finally got energy and time to do some cross country skiing. Last week my youngest boy was home with the flu and I stayed indoors all the time taking care of the poor one. But on saturday we tried some skiing but his energy ran out quickly. 

On the sunday I went of to the forest myself to ski 6 km, and today I got home earlier from work to take the same track again. It's so fun, I didn't knew I missed this since I haven't skiing cross country since I was a kid.  The slopes are very scary though, theres nothing to hold on to exept the tracks when you go down. Apart from downhill skiing when you have the steel lining to get a grip.

Restyle sale

Restyle.pl is a webstore filled with lots of lovely clothes and accesoires. The quality is very varying but the prices are low. Recently I bought a couple of items at the sale at Restyle. I bought the shirt; Punk Rave Y-213 with ruffles and extended sleeves.

The size was L. I wanted to buy XL but there were no left so I thought I would try. I would rather call this a size medium, but the arms are so thin on the shirt that if I loose weight I'm not sure I will be able to use it anyway :(. This is how it looks on the model.

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I also bought a pair of sunglasses. Very 50's style. I'm not sure how many of this kind of glasses I have used through the years and brake. I will always be in need of at least a pair of these. They goes well with victorian style clothes and vintage clothes. I got a little annoyed to see that there were a few of those purple glass gothic ones left right now as there were no left when I bought these, grr. I have to limit myself now!!

My first underbust corset was bought from the sale; the heavy lacing corset green. I tried it on and it looks fabulous. It reduces my waist with almost 4 inches and feels comfortable to wear. I think it will be great to train in. The quality seems quite good comparing to those I have. The outer fabric seems a little fragile though it is a flocked lace print on a thin emerald green fabric. I'm sure I will by more of these.

I took a long walk yesterday to go to our supermarket to get a postal delivery. The walk took a little more than an hour and I was freezing my ass of, literally. It was -12 degrees C and a beautiful day with shimmering ice crystals in the air and on the trees. I decided to take a stroll around the church and the churchyard that I pass on the way. 

This is our beautiful little wooden church in our neighbourhood. It is built sometime during the 17th century. The closests graves around the church are very mixed in age. I passed a new one with a picture of a young boy who died  two years ago in a motorcycle accident just a kilometer away. The atmosphere around the stone was so sad and sorrowful that I started to cry. I guess that it was the imprint of his mourning relatives that I felt.

Update: I'm so damn sick and tired of my owerweight. As I feel better in my head I have the energy to take care of the rest. I've been trying Ashtanga Yoga a few times and got really stuck on it. I love the silence, the breathing sound, the meditativeness and the tought gymnastics. I have checked the instructors out and they are very muscular. That is understandable because I hade muscle ace in a week after the first session.

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It is held in a beautiful slag stone building by the river. As a contrast, Johan had attended a hyper modern gym with fitness people and lots of classes with tricky names like cxsworx cx30, bodycombat and easy line. We are kidding each other about the training. I'm definitely not in the mood for pounding music and strange machines, I prefer "ohm shanti shanti".

Gothidays 2012, Day Five and a Bat Fit Challenge

When I read the Professors new blogpost in the Gothidays theme I was actually going to show some of my other spooky holiday decorations. But since this also is a challenge in Bat fit I simply couldn't resist writing about my health status and view on the christmas food.

The picture below illustrates the typical dinner table for a christmas celebration. And the picture is actually saying the truth. Swedes are tucking in all these foods during a loong dinner that starts at noon and ending by late evening at christmas eve (yes we are celebrating the eve day).

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So what to do..... well I have to eat decorations!! And people look at me strangely when I'm fuzzing about the non existent vegetables. I'm not a big fan of the christmas table and that over eating frenzie. I like to enjoy one of theese dishes at a time and add vegetables. I have simply refused to cook a dinner like that one above to my family, I'm not a slave in the kitchen even if I enjoy cooking and baking.

So a little update... Since I have been ill for a while, I haven't been able to do the exercise and do the cooking at home, I have been exhausted. But I'm better now and started to eat vitamin D to compensate the lack of light, I recommend it! It makes you more lighter on the inside. I have started to eat more raw food. Breakfast and lunch is mostly raw and vegan. I'm trying to cut down on the dairy products and meat and a bit on the carbs.

I can see a slight difference in weight and less hunger feelings. But we have christmas holidays coming and me and Oskars birthdays do I have to try to balance this. Next year will be another bat fit year for me, I have plans :)

The veggies on the pictures comes from my own garden the summer 2012 

The best thing with winter is the snow! I love skiing both cross country and downhill. I love to showel snow and help the kids to build snow castles, snow men and snow piles. I enjoy the cold air. The nature is beautiful this time of year. Who wants to sit indoors when it's so much fun to do outside?

A healthy week without a car and app tips

Oh my little beloved pumpkin is left at the metal workshop for some special treatment and a painting. "Someone" lend my car and backed it into his car, my was smashed. Now our other car is broke and we have been without a car for almost a week now (hope pumkin is well treated over there) we have been travelling on two wheels instead. My bum is aching but I achieve lots of fit points. Yesterday I scored 27 km because I had to take the bike to town to attend a parent meeting at school.

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To help me with my goals I use two apps in my android phone. 
The sports tracker I use is Endomondo. I think it's good though I haven't really compared with other sportstrackers. The positive thing with the sports tracker is that I can track myself when I'm in the forest for a run or walk and I can keep a record of how long my walk is. With input from weight, length and gender I also get a calories burnt record. If I would be unlucky to stumble and break a leg, faint or anything like that it's easy for someone else to find me because I can share my profile to my other fellows on endomondo. And send some peptalks to them ;)

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For tracking food intake I use the Shape up club app. I found it via a friend on facebook who was very pleased with it. The app and membership is free but you can also pay for a gold membership with a fair price (much cheaper than weight watchers). The best thing with this app is that you have a barcode reader for instant recording of calories. If you do exercise you add allowed calories for the day. I think its easier than weight watchers (that doesn't even have an android app) because calories are always printed on the food packages. 

on facebook

I highly recommend people who track their calorie intake to take a look at skinnytaste. Awesome recipes and tempting pictures and all recipes are pro points and calorie calculated. Some of the recipes are different from what I'm used to as a swede (not the vegetable :P )but that makes it more interesting.

Tomorrow is friday and I'll take a day off from work. I'm very close to being washed out. I have loss in short term memory and other fysical symptoms. I'll just take a day to breathe a little and do useless things. Hopefully I'm back on track on monday again because I can't be away from work right now. 

Something edible and a Bat fit reeboot

Just around the corner, there is nature filled with lots of nice things to eat. Healthy nutricious food. Thanks to 

the rainy summer there is lots of fungus to pick. The amount of chantarelles is huge this year, the places were they grow are kept as big secrets for everyone else. If you get a tip of a chantarelle place you have received a generous gift.

Something that not many knows is that puffballs are edible and in the right and in the right condition they are a delicacy. I found a place with an enormous amount of puffballs, unfortunately they weren't in the right condition. They must be completely white on the inside and steady (like a mushroom). These were white but spongy. Served best as peeled, sliced and fried in a pan with a little olive oil.

In swedish we have a word for beautiful places, called wild strawberry spot (but in swedish). It's also a place were wild strawberries grow. I have a place were the ground in the wood is filled with berries. We picked a large cup of wild strawberries yesterday. If you mash them with icing sugar you get the most tasty icing for a cake you can eat. I put them in the freezer for baking later.

Bat fit reeboot

So it's time to make a reebot of the bat fit. Have I reach any goals? Frankly dear readers; no I haven't. I've been kind of stuck at the same weight during the whole summer. Back to work I can feel it's easier to eat less. 

Another goal is to exercise. Unfortunately I can't run at the moment. I have pain in the lower back and hips and when I tried to run every other day at the beginning of the vacation I wasn't almost able to walk the other day. So I have to do softer things like walking and cycling (that hurts too). I will visit the local bath to try swimming..... Yes I have booked a visit at the nurse .

A short walk of 40 minutes in nice surroundings can make me a little happier and healthier.

The third goal is one that I have achieved better results with; my mood. I will not talk about how bad it has been here, that's my own buisness. I feeling better and better for every day. I'm more confident at my work (even if I still feel as a big fake sometimes) and I can make a joke of stupid things. I'm still very scared making other people dissapointed though.

Lite försiktiga pasteller

Häromdagen städade jag köket och tog bort allt som påminner om jul och vinter. Änglaljustaken byttes ut mot en kaffepanna.

The other day I cleaned the kitchen and took away everything that reminded of christmas or winter. The angel candle light holder is replaced by a coffe pot.

På tallrikshyllan fick det komma upp lite pastelliga kökssaker, som dessertskålarna jag köpte på loppis för inte så längesedan och en gräddkanna från Green Gate.

I put up some pastel coloured things on my plate shelf, like the dessert bowls I recently bought in a thrift store and a cream pitcher from Green Gate.

Julgardinerna är borta och på bordet ligger en blommig duk.

Christmas curtains are gone and on the table lays a cross stitched cloth with flowers on.

I fönstret är julstjärnorna är utbytta mot rosa blommor.

Christmas flowers are replaced by pink ones.

Igår var jag på plantagen och köpte blomjord och kunde inte motstå små penseer. Visst går de att ha inomhus också?

I went to the garden market yesterday to buy pot soil and couldn't resist theese cute pansies. I beleive they is nice to have indoors as well.

De blev perfekta att trycka ner i zinkkonerna, jag har bara virat om lite plastfolie om jorden.

They turned out really nice in my zinc cones, I just vrapped the soil with some plastic foil first.

Sen måste jag erkänna att jag är lite ambivalent när det gäller vintern. Solen lyser och snön smälter men ändå vill jag hålla kvar den här vintern lite till. Jag har ju precis köpt skidor till mig och killarna (det är Oskar som är där borta på krönet).

But I feel a bit ambivalent about the winter. The sun is shining and the snow is melting but I actually would like it to last a little longer. I just bought skiis for me an the boys (it's Oskar on top of the hill barely visible).

Ja som ni ser jag var lite väl optimistisk idag. Oskar säger att han ska åka imorgon också. Det var betydligt bättre spår inne i skogen men därifrån har jag ingen bild.

As you can see, I am very optimistic but Oskar said he wanted to go tomorrow as well. It was far better tracks in the forest but I don't have a picture to show from there.

Det var ju sisådär 15 år sedan jag stod på längdskidor sist. Jag ramlade liksom i varenda nedförsbacke (jag är lite mer van med slalomskidor) så jag kommer att ha en saftig lårkaka ikväll.


I can tell you it is merely 15 years ago I tried cross country skiing. I fell in every slope ( I'm more used with downhill skiing) so I will get a huge bruise on my thigh tonight.